I've never seen an episode of Jon and Kate Plus 8 for two reasons 1) I don't think turning your uterus into a science experiment and then birthing a litter of human kittens makes you worthy of your own TV show and 2) having eight small kids of my own would be my absolute worst nightmare come to life (unless they were like, using their small hands for something constructive like making me outfits with intricate detailing) so I don't think watching this screaming nightmare play out on television every week would be particularly entertaining for me. The only exposure I've had to the show is the clips my boyfriend Joel McHale has shown on The Soup and from those alone it seems like this Kate woman is a real turbo bitch and her husband is a real pussy. Are we sure it wasn't him that birthed that litter of kitties? In Kate's defense, if I had eight kids, I'd be a heinous twat too. Insufferable. It doesn't explain her hair though, seriously, what the fuck is with that shit? Did one of her kids get a hold of the scissors?
Anyway, despite never having seen the show, I can't escape these two douchebags because they are all over the God damned place lately with their supposed marital problems and rumoured cheating. It would be physically impossible for me to care any less about these famewhores but here's one thing I do care about; apparently because the rumours around these two have made the show such a ratings bonanza and cash cow (nearly ten million people watched the season premiere this week, WTF?) TLC has decided to squash plans to give Jennifer Lopez her own reality show. Apparently the show was set to centre on JLo launching her new fragrance. Sounds like a stinker of a show to me. So while I'm sick of looking at Jon and Kate plus their eight kids, if they kept JLo off my TV, I'm eternally grateful.
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